Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Special du Jour: Cottontails- or something like that...

Every other Wednesday is a rather pleasant night in our house. Because in year four I finally felt like I could carpool with another mom to cheer. Due to this fabulous arrangement I get two nights a month when it's just Agnes and me. It's so wonderful and it feels like she's an only child- soaking up all the attention that is usually being divided up 25/25/50%...yes, even now Edith requires the most attention at all times.

But every other Wednesday is a little piece of bliss for both Agnes and myself. Quiet. Time just for her to be five.

Tonight is one of those every other Wednesdays. Agnes started kindergarten with a bang and never looked back. The first day we walked her into her classroom she just said good-bye and went on her way. The second day of kindergarten she climbed up the hill at the end of the day and announced, "Mrs. Lennartz got sick today and went home so we had a sub" like this shit happens all the time. Poor Mrs. Lennartz was sick for the next two days and never once did Agnes bat an eye at it, it was as if she had been in kindergarten forever and teachers get sick and that's just how it is when you have to have a substitute. Unfortunately for Mrs. Lennartz all the moms at pick-up like to chat and by the time the second day of having a substitute rolled around we had her all sorts of knocked up with her second kid.

As it turns out, she really was just sick...and not pregnant. Our gossip at the top of the hill is always so much more interesting than the real truth.

My point in all this rambling is that Miss Agnes just kind  of started the school year like an old pro and sometimes even I forget that she really is only in her third month of full-time, honest to God, real school.

Since it as quiet tonight I remembered that and we chatted about the day. She told me who has to turn their cards to yellow (for being naughty) and who got to help the poor little girl who had surgery this weekend after a rather freak accident that all the town knew about the next morning. Then I asked, "What was for hot lunch today?"

"Well, I had a chicken sandwich. I like hot lunch, I want to have it everyday. I'm not picky when it comes to hot lunch."

Really, I thought...wonder how much of that lunch you actually eat, since you never, ever, ever eat anything that I cook at home.

No joke, Agnes probably goes to bed hungry five nights out of the seven in a week because she doesn't eat dinner. As my friend's kitchen sign says, "Tonight's Menu is: Eat It OR Starve". Agnes almost always chooses the safe route with 'Starve.'

"What fruit or vegetable did you have for your lunch today?" I asked knowing that is a hard-core rule that they have to have something that grew on a tree or in the dirt on their plate.

"I had cottontails," she said as she munched on her pizza (this is one of the 2/7ths of the week of the week she ate since it was a recognizable, three-ingredient entree).

"You had what?" I asked.

"I had cottontails," she said again.

"What is that?" I asked wondering how in the hell I missed that on the menu.

"Cottontails are a kind of fruit that you don't know about," she explained very matter-of-factly.

"Oh. OK. Well, what's it look like?"

"Well there are grapes in it and peaches and pears..."

I started laughing, "Do you mean you had fruit cocktail?"

"Yes!" she exclaimed happily.

I was also happy to know that she was eating fruit and not part of what might come off of Adeline for dinner if I ever catch her chewing on my new couch.

Today is my weekly volunteering day at school. I spend almost the entire morning going between their three classes and doing whatever it is the teachers need me to do. It's a great reminder that I once had a great teaching career and that I really probably shouldn't ever do it again as being in contact with that many kids for that long of a period is not a mentally healthy situation for me.

It was cold and I needed something comfy and warm. I had been eyeing up this cream sweater in my closet that I bought last year. I kind of feel like a marshmallow when I wear it but I thought today if I put on tall brown boots and a scarf is would look less S'mores ingredient and more like a piece of winter clothing. I think I made it work.

The scarf was a score on a fabulous girls' week in Florida I took a few years ago. It was lovely. (and now that I see the sweater in a picture I feel like it's much less marshamallow-y than it was before I lost those 15 pounds...perhaps it wasn't so much the sweater that looked marshamallow-y as it was ME that looked that way...hmmmmmm, ouch, the truth hurts...).

Once I had to actually head outside today I had to throw on a jacket, again, as it turns out, I should have gone with the parka. I did graduate myself from a vest to the jacket but I was still freezing. Those 10-30 mph. winds did not bode well with my cute red jacket. This jacket was a great find on a a Target clearance rack last year. Probably something I would have never paid full price for but I love that I got it cheap and it adds some fun and brightness to my closet without feeling guilty about a high price tag.

I know people say, "If you wouldn't buy it full price, don't buy it on sale, it's a waste of money." I agree to some extent but then again, I don't NEED jackets in every color under the rainbow but it's certainly fun to play with them and I don't feel as guilty if I'm not paying full price- it's a fun way to add variety without busting the budget.

And that's all I've got for today. Nothing new on the relo front, just in the same holding pattern. I wish I knew but then again every day I don't know is one day longer that we can work toward finishing out the cheer season here (which is good since I'm about to write the last two big checks for the makes no sense to pay for the whole year and then leave without finishing it, right?).

SS, who seriously starting to rue her decision to type this entire post without wearing's getting chilly up in here!


  1. You know, I had completely forgotten that for a brief period you transformed your blog into a fitness blog and were posting about feeling fat. And now that you are posting model-worthy photos again I don't know how I even remembered. Oh yes, you mentioned it yourself. If not for that I would never have remembered. You look fantastic, as always. And despite your insistence that you curse and want to give away your children you sound like a great mom and wife. Your husband and children are lucky to have you. And if you ever do move to Tennessee I may one day tell you so to your face while sober for no particular reason other than that I have run out of other things to talk about. By the way, I have a neighbor who reminds me SO MUCH of you. She dresses just like you and is perpetually fabulous and slim. She has 4 kids instead of 3, but you can't tell from looking at her that she ever had any. Again, same as you. On the flip side, she doesn't ever cuss and doesn't drink and I think you are probably a lot more fun to hang around than her. A LOT more. We were at a party tonight and she and her husband were there. Very nice people. But it could have benefited from your unique sense of humor. Snark is way fun. This party was very polite.

    And I'm rambling ....

  2. Naked Steve- Yes, there's another ball I dropped- the blogging about Jillian Michaels, I guess the important part wasn't the blogging about it but the actual execution of her program and I'll be damned but that bitch knows her stuff. She has done miraculous things to my body and I freaking love her for that. I'll tell you why that other woman isn't as funny...because kids slowly suck the funny out of you and at about 25% a pop, being that I have three kids- I've got about 25% of my original funny left...her last kid? ZAP! It zapped the shit out of her funny. She should probably drink, that does help to restore the funny...and your sanity.

  3. I haven't had any kids, but something is sucking the funny out of me lately. I think you're still pretty darned hilarious, though. And stylish. You don't have the 'mom' look going on at all.


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